Feng Shui Bonus: Enhance Your Love Life

After my recent post on using feng shui to attract wealth, a reader asked me if we can use feng shui for improving relationships. The answer is yes.

photo credit: ibm4381

The following suggestions are of two kinds. The first set is more practical and easy for the rational mind to understand. The second set of suggestions is symbolic, and make sense if you believe in the power of symbols in shaping our thoughts and thus our reality.

Practical feng shui for love

If someone walked into your home and bedroom, would it be obvious that the place was set up for a couple? Or does your home scream “bachelor(ette) pad!” at every turn? If you’re already living with a partner, you could also check that your bedroom and home are conducive for both of you.

Here are some basic ways to convert your swinging domain for one into a love nest for two, to start preparing room in your life for a partner:

Bedroom

Replace your single bed with either a queen- or king-sized double bed.
Both sides of the bed should be as equal as possible, eg pillows and reading lamps on both sides and not just one.
The bed should be accessible from both sides, rather than jamming one side up against a wall making it difficult for another person to climb in.
Remove the TV, computer and other activity-based (yang) elements, so that the main activity in the room is conversation or making love.
Ditch the fluorescent lights for soft yellow bulbs (of the energy-saving variety, for environmental reasons).
Use candles or essential oils, even when you’re sleeping alone, to create an atmosphere of romance.

General

Make space for a second car in the garage or outside the house.
Have a spare set of house keys readily available.
Arrange chairs in pairs, facing each other at right angles so you can see the person’s side profile, but not head-on in a confrontational position.
Meal settings should be for two, even if you’re eating alone. Have at least a position for a second person, even if you don’t lay out the utensils.
Furnishings should be soft and inviting, eg love seats or sofas for two to make another person want to be around.

Symbolic feng shui for love

Our thoughts create our reality. If you want a loving relationship with a partner, set up your home to remind you of this, so that your subconscious can get to work creating the actual relationship you are seeking.

Display items in pairs eg candles, wooden mandarin ducks, pictures of couples, cushions, workstations and anything else that represents coupledom.
Tables and mirrors should be oval or round as far as possible, avoiding the sharp ‘cutting’ corners or squares or rectangles.
Avoid images of single figures, sad faces and broken hearts in general. Choose images of couples, happiness, love, or whatever you want to see in your life.
Choose colours that represent love and romance, which to most people means reds and pinks. You don’t have to paint your entire room this colours – just splashes will suffice. Background colours can be soothing pale earth or brown shades.

Your relationship areas

In feng shui, both the southwest area or far right corner from front door are the relationship area. The practical and symbolic tips should be especially applied to these areas of your bedroom and home.

To me, feng shui is a reflection of life. Your life probably also has ‘relationship areas’. These are the special times or places when you are alone with your partner, or that you’d like to share with someone special. Apply what makes sense to these times and places to enhance your love life.

This is a bonus post in the series on Feng Shui:

Posted by Daphne | June 16, 2009 | in Be Kind

41 Responses to “Feng Shui Bonus: Enhance Your Love Life”

Feng Shui Bonus: Enhance Your Love Life | fengfshui.com
June 16th, 2009 @ 11:51 am
[...] View original here: Feng Shui Bonus: Enhance Your Love Life [...]
Carla
June 16th, 2009 @ 1:41 pm
I will definitely keep this advice in mind for after we relocate. Right now, I’m working on keeping our bedroom clutter free which is so much more relaxing and restful than the alternative!
Giovanna Garcia
June 16th, 2009 @ 3:10 pm
This is very interesting :-) I am going to make a few adjustment, but I am not going to tell you what they are. ;-)

Thanks for sharing.
Giovanna Garcia
Imperfect Action is better than No Action
Barbara Swafford
June 16th, 2009 @ 3:12 pm
Hi Daphne,

I’ve read a little on Feng Shui and find it quite fascinating. After reading this post it reminded me of a story I read of woman who “made room” for when a man would enter her life, including making room for a second car in the garage, room in the closet, and she began sleeping on one side of the bed instead of the middle. Magically, (or not) she met someone and soon was a married woman. Hmmmm! Feng Shui in action? Maybe.
J.D. Meier
June 16th, 2009 @ 3:53 pm
Way to get jiggy with it!

I don’t know if it’s Feng Shui, but don’t forget the mood music … “bow wow chicky chicky bow wow.”

Feng Shui just always sounds practical and I like how you outline the key things. Yes, figures of happiness over broken hearts sounds like the way to go.
Lance
June 16th, 2009 @ 6:16 pm
Hi Daphne,
This is all so interesting. In some ways, I’ve got it…and in other ways – there’s so much more I can do to really set the mood. The idea of pairs of things – I think this is great (and somewhere I can improve greatly). Thanks much for this Daphne…
Megan "JoyGirl!" Bord
June 16th, 2009 @ 7:50 pm
I can attest to the power of Feng Shui to bring about relationship bliss. I cleaned up the energy in my home and about two months later, the love of my life appeared. (I’d been waiting for him for quite awhile!) One other tip I like is to use the color red to neutralize “problem” items. For instance, I have an a/c in my bedroom window (which is where my relationship gua is located). Rather than have a frosty love life, I added two red hearts to it (cut out of paper). This stuff works!
Roger | A Content Life
June 16th, 2009 @ 8:03 pm
Daphne,

This advice makes sense to me. If you want a lover in your life, it makes sense to set up your home to accommodate a lover.
Tess The Bold Life
June 16th, 2009 @ 9:17 pm
Daphne,
I have 98% of these without even trying. Maybe that’s why we’ve been together so long! Weird but wonderful!
Vered - MomGrind
June 16th, 2009 @ 11:07 pm
Many of the decorating tips make sense even if you don’t practice Feng Shui. I think our house is actually Feng Shui in many ways, without even trying!
Tom Volkar / Delightful Work
June 16th, 2009 @ 11:35 pm
Very cool list of suggestions. Might I add the most important one? Create a vacuum by clearing up and past resentments or unaddressed situations with past partners. Then once emotionally clear nature will rush in with the possibilities.
Positively Present
June 17th, 2009 @ 12:27 am
Considering my love life is…well…non-existent, this post is a great one for me. I think Feng Shui is so cool and I’m determined to put it to work in my room this weekend.
Ian | Quantum Learning
June 17th, 2009 @ 3:41 am
Daphne

The more I read your posts on the subject, the clearer it becomes to me that consciously arranging living space is so important. I tend to just throw things together randomly. But I’ve been looking at things in a new light after reading your series. A lot to take in – but very worthwhile! Thank you
Chris Edgar | Purpose Power Coaching
June 17th, 2009 @ 6:06 am
Hi Daphne — it’s funny, when my house and car are clean and spacious, I do seem to feel more solid relating with women, like I’ve got everything together. I never thought of this in terms of feng shui but that is an interesting perspective.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:01 am
Carla,

Any room free of clutter is so much more relaxing and restful, and the bedroom of all places is the one we spend a lot of time resting in, so perhaps the most important room to de-clutter.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:02 am
Hi Giovanna,

Now you’ve got me curious as to what changes you’re going to make! Enjoy the adjustments :)
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:03 am
Hi Barbara,

I remember reading that story before, and recalled it when I wrote this post. A lot of this has to do with our state of mind and I guess doing all that made her think and act in a way that was conducive to attracting a partner? Truly fascinating.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:04 am
JD,

Definitely remember the groovy mood music! :) Feng shui is practical up to a point, which is where I stopped. It does go on to sound a lot like superstition when you get down to the nitty gritty and I don’t understand that enough to write about it.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:05 am
Hey Lance,

You seem to be doing fine in your life, with or without fengshui. I wouldn’t worry about pairs of things too much. I’m trying out the ideas myself and will know soon if they work!
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:06 am
Megan,

That’s a lovely example, thanks for sharing! And I’m happy that you’ve found the love of your life, and are convinced that fengshui played a part. Putting the two hearts on your a/c was a clever idea. I might try that myself…
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:07 am
Hi Roger,

Some of this is really common sense, isn’t it? There’s more to fengshui that doesn’t sound like common sense at all, and I don’t know or believe enough to write about that other stuff.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:08 am
Tess,

You were together so long probably for many reasons, most important of which is your personal commitment. It’s nice to think that perhaps fengshui played a small role too!
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:10 am
Vered,

I like these tips because they’re so logical and make rational sense. Good to know your home is set up in a fengshui way, whether or not it matters!
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:11 am
Tom,

Great suggestion to create a vacuum, and you’re right that this is probably more important than any furniture arrangement or decoration we can dream up. Clearing up clutter, both in our homes and in our hearts, is certainly the first step in creating room for everything else.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:12 am
Hey PP (may I call you that?),

Good to know that you intend to try out some of these tips this weekend. I’ve already implemented some of them, and the best impact is on my state of mind. Have fun!
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:13 am
Ian,

I like the way you phrased this: “consciously arranging living space is so important”. This could sum up the whole practice of fengshui. I used to arrange things randomly too, and really liked the results when I experimented with fengshui.
Daphne
June 17th, 2009 @ 8:14 am
Chris,

Interesting experience you’ve had. Try displaying a pair of birds or such in your car or home and let me know how your love life goes! ;)
Chris Edgar | Purpose Power Coaching
June 18th, 2009 @ 12:33 am
Oh, things are all right now because I’ve got time to clean up every day. But things will get more busy soon and then I’ll be in the market for wooden ducks for sure. :)
Hilary
June 18th, 2009 @ 1:04 am
Hi Daphne .. interesting ideas and everyone’s comments are so apposite. I have to say I feel better with a decluttered existence. Some of the things I can do and do do .. but the south west area and to the right of the front door .. are in the half of the house that was sold off before I bought my bit!! So I have a few problems there .. never mind, when I move in the future I can make a plan!

Thanks – good thoughts -
Hilary Melton-Butcher
Positive Letters
Stacey Shipman
June 18th, 2009 @ 8:35 am
Hey Daphne,
Your series was so fun! Thanks for sharing all of these feng shui tips, you really made them easy to digest!
Jocelyn at I TAKE OFF THE MASK
June 18th, 2009 @ 9:29 am
Thanks for the tips! Is it true that we should also avoid placing water elements in our bedroom?
Daphne
June 18th, 2009 @ 12:43 pm
Chris,

I’ll sell you my pair of wooden ducks, guaranteed to bring eternal bliss, deepest love, and thousands of children and grandchildren, all for the lucky price of $88! ;)
Daphne
June 18th, 2009 @ 12:45 pm
Hilary,

Feng shui isn’t for everyone. I knew about it for years before I overcame my skepticism and explored it in more detail. Also, I think the southwest would refer to the part of the house you’re living in now, rather than the whole house or building. Again, no need to take all this too seriously, as long as the important parts of your life are in order, which from your blog sounds like they are!
Daphne
June 18th, 2009 @ 12:47 pm
Hi Stacey,

It’s fun to decorate house, whether we use feng shui tips or not! Glad you found the points easy to digest, since fengshui can come so close to superstition sometimes.
Daphne
June 18th, 2009 @ 12:49 pm
Hi Jocelyn,

All the fengshui guides I’ve read say that water features don’t belong in the bedroom, so I suppose it’s true. I think the rationale is either that water features like fish tanks are too yang because of the life energy in them, whereas the bedroom should be yin for resting. The other reason I’ve read is that the water may ‘wash’ away the good chi in the bedroom.
Davina
June 18th, 2009 @ 3:00 pm
Hi Daphne. Loving this series! You know, it occurred to me while reading this (as a swinging single) and with no current romantic interests, that many of these tips can be conducive to “loving yourself”; one of the best ways to attract a loving partner, I believe.
Arswino
June 19th, 2009 @ 2:12 pm
Hi Daphne,

They look wonderful to me, however I can not put all of them into practice. Maybe I can try some of them if possible.
Thanks for the tips. :)
Daphne
June 19th, 2009 @ 11:06 pm
Hey Davina,

Glad to have a swinging single buddy in you. Yes key to all this is loving ourselves, because of the aura that creates that attracts people to us. Bottoms up to self-love, my blogging and single buddy!
Daphne
June 19th, 2009 @ 11:07 pm
Hi Arswino,

No pressure to put any of these into practice. I resisted and forgot about these tips for years, and still survived :)
Sunny Jamiel
June 22nd, 2009 @ 5:41 pm
Daphne,

Thanks for posting these tips. I’m gonna use some of them. :-)
Feng Shui Romance
July 24th, 2009 @ 12:12 am
Know that feng Shui is an ancient Chinese system of aesthetics believed to use the laws of both Heaven and Earth to help one improve life by receiving positive qi