Take Control Of Your Life

Can you imagine getting into a car not knowing where you want to go? You could have the driving skills of Lewis Hamilton and it wouldn’t matter, because you still don’t know where to head. All the talent in the world is useless if you don’t have a direction to guide you.

In the same way, you are the driver of this vehicle called life. Do you know where your life is headed, and what it will be like in five years? Most people would answer No. You can answer Yes to this question if you take control. The only way to predict the future is to create it.

1. Pick a destination

Many people planning a vacation will look at brochures showing attractive pictures of various places, and then decide where they want to go. It’s the same for life. The attractive pictures you look at could be the lives of successful people, a vision in your mind of what your life could be, or a personal hero whose character you admire.

It’s okay to have more than one destination, just as many of us will travel to more than one place in the world over a lifetime. The important thing is that you can only go to one place at a time, or perhaps throw in a couple of stops at nearby locations. By all means have a list of dreams to achieve in your life, just know that you can only focus on one to three goals at any one time.

2. Get a roadmap

Few of us are foolish enough to go on a driving holiday without a map, and yet that is how we go through life. You may know what you want to go, but have no idea where you are now and how far away you are from your destination. We just live from day to day hoping that one day we will wake up to the life of our dreams. That is like keeping your foot on the accelerator hoping you end up in Hawaii, not realising that Hawaii is surrounded by water and you won’t get there by car.

Your roadmap for life will come from autobiographies of successful people telling the story of how they got to where they are, self-improvement books with various strategies you could choose from, and the advice of well-chosen mentors who have been where you want to go and are willing to lead you there.

3. Plan your route

There is usually more than one way to get to wherever you want to go. Part of the fun in planning a vacation is deciding which road to take, where to stop for a rest, and taking a detour now and then for the sheer enjoyment of viewing the scenery.

Your life journey is much the same. You may want the same success as another person, but for you the route to that destination may be different. You may want to choose a method that gets you there faster, or you could decide to take a longer time so that you can stop along the way to enjoy the process. You could even choose to go off the beaten path and try a strategy that no one has used before.

4. Enjoy the journey

You’ll spend a lot more time on the journey than at the destination. Once you reach a goal, you’ll probably set a new goal very soon. It’s human nature to always want something better, and this is normal and healthy. We were born to grow, not to sit and stare. So most of your life will be spent pursuing new goals that stretch and challenge you. Enjoy the sense of achievement when you reach your goals, but also take delight in the journey.

Enjoy the friendships you make along the way, the first-hand experiences, the lessons learnt, the patience acquired, the insights into human nature, the understanding gained about yourself.

When you get to wherever you wanted to go, you’ll look around and appreciate being in a new place. But even more, you will look back on the journey it took to get there, breathe a sigh of satisfaction, and say to yourself, “I’ve come a long way.” And that, my friend, is what makes the journey worthwhile.



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Posted by Daphne | September 22, 2008 | in Work Hard


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  • Comments by Readers

  • B @ logos coaching: What a great list. I am especially drawn to number 2 as I am incorporating more silence and quiet time into my life at present....
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  • Self-esteem Building: I agree that our thinking gives positive or negative meaning to a certain event, person etc. Nature is neutral. It’s...
  • Hilary: Hi Daphne .. good points .. adopt a hero – yourself – ensure you smile, be kind, be open, be friendly .. Draw the boundaries is...
  • J.D. Meier: Beautiful distillations … heroes, boundaries, and buddies are the way to go. It takes less energy to be yourself than be somebody...
  • Lance: Hi Daphne, Number 4 is an important one for me. It’s so easy for other people’s attitudes to filter over into our own –...
  • Mazhar Nawaz: Dear Daphne enjoyed reading every word. I appreciate your honest views on Live Like You’ll Die Tomorrow.
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  • Lindsey Petersen: I am a die hard optimist who leads a happy life even when I should be sad…an anomaly, I guess! Lindsey Petersen...
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  • James Gray: When you say that good and bad aren’t “out there,” it isn’t clear what that means. I don’t know if anyone...
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